Introduction: Why We Need to Stop Worrying
“How to stop worrying” is a goal that many of us strive to achieve, as worrying is a typical human experience that we all encounter from time to time. As part of our lives, it’s perfectly normal to have concerns about a variety of matters. Yet, for a number of people, worry escalates and spirals out of control. Becoming not just a passing thought but a persistent, chronic issue. This kind of intense and constant worrying can have substantial negative effects, both mentally and physically.
According to Mind, 1 in 6 people report experiencing a common mental health problem like anxiety in any given week in England. That’s nearly 10 million people who struggle with persistent, excessive worrying on a regular basis.
Worrying refers to anxious thoughts about real or imagined threats in the future. It often involves “what if” thinking, catastrophising, and imagining the worst possible outcomes. While a little bit of worrying can help us prepare for challenges, chronic worrying serves no productive purpose. It just creates stress and interferes with our ability to live fully in the present moment.
Excessive worrying has been linked to health problems like high blood pressure, insomnia, digestive issues, headaches, and fatigue. It can also lead to or worsen issues like depression, anxiety disorders, and substance abuse. Learning to reduce worrying is critical for both mental and physical wellbeing.
With some strategies and a bit of practice, anyone can gain more control over their worrying thoughts and live a fuller, less anxious life. This article provides helpful tips and techniques you can start applying right away to stop worrying and start living.
How to Stop Worrying: Understand the Causes
Worrying is a very common issue that affects people from all walks of life. Understanding what tends to trigger worry and anxiety can help gain control over it. Here are some of the most common causes of worrying:
- Stress – When we feel stressed about finances, work, relationships, health, or other aspects of life, it’s normal for the mind to go into a state of worry. The mind starts imagining worst-case scenarios related to the source of stress.
- Uncertainty – The unknown often leaves room for the mind to imagine negative possibilities. Big life changes like a move or job change can trigger worry about the future.
- Trauma – Past traumatic events like abuse, loss of a loved one, divorce can plant seeds of worry and doubt within us. We may worry about history repeating itself.
- Personality – Some of us are just prone to worry more than others. Perfectionists and people pleasers tend to be affected more by worry and anxiety.
- Health Problems – Thyroid issues, heart problems and other health conditions can contribute to increased anxiety levels.
- Substance Abuse – Reliance on alcohol, drugs or medications can exacerbate worry over time.
Noticing patterns about when you tend to worry more can help identify the triggers. For example, many people experience more worry at night when trying to fall asleep, or on Sundays when dreading the work week. Identifying your personal worry triggers is an important first step in learning how to short-circuit the habit.
How to Stop Worrying: Identify Anxious Thoughts
Constant worrying often stems from cognitive distortions or irrational thoughts. Identifying these thinking patterns is an important first step. Common cognitive distortions include:
- Catastrophising – Expecting the worst case scenario to happen. Thinking “what if” something terrible occurs even when there is little evidence to support it.
- Black and white thinking – Viewing situations in absolutes, like good/bad or success/failure, rather than shades of gray.
- Overgeneralisation – Making broad conclusions based on a single incident. For example, thinking one failure means you will never succeed.
- Mind reading – Believing you know what others are thinking, usually in a negative way.
- Predicting the future – usually envisioning negative outcomes.
- Magnification/minimisation – Exaggerating the negatives and discounting the positives.
Challenge Worrisome Thoughts
Worrying thoughts often feel uncontrollable. A thought comes into your mind, and your immediate reaction is to believe it and react with anxiety. But you can challenge your anxious thoughts. When you notice yourself worrying, take a step back and examine your thoughts objectively. Here are some techniques:
Keep a Thought Journal
Keep track of your anxious thoughts by writing them down. Make note of the following:
- What is the worried thought?
- What triggered this thought?
- How did you react to the thought emotionally and physically?
- What would be a more realistic thought?
Keeping a thought journal helps you identify patterns in your anxious thoughts and recognise which situations tend to trigger them. It also gives you a chance to come up with more positive responses.
Techniques to Respond to Anxious Thoughts
When you notice yourself having an anxious thought, try using these techniques to respond:
- Think realistically: Consider if your thought is based in reality and what evidence there is to support it. Ask yourself, what is the likelihood this disastrous scenario will actually happen?
- Put things in perspective: Even if the worst did happen, how critical would it really be in the long-run?
- Look at the big picture: Rather than imagining the worst-case scenario, take a broader perspective. How might you look back on this time a month from now?
- Find a different viewpoint: Imagine how a friend would evaluate this situation. Would they have the same fearful thoughts?
- Use positive self-talk: Counter anxious thoughts with affirming statements like “I can handle this” or “This too shall pass.”
With practice, you can make responding to worried thoughts a habit and help stop the cycle of anxiety.
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can help identify and reframe thinking patterns. CBT is an approach to psychotherapy that has been proven effective for the treatment of major depression and anxiety disorders. The goal of CBT is to help people understand how their thoughts, feelings and behaviors are related so they can change problematic patterns. CBT can help you understand the connection between your thoughts, feelings and behaviors. It can also assist you in developing more effective coping strategies for dealing with anxiety-provoking situations.
CBT techniques can include:
- Writing down worried thoughts and analysing them objectively. Ask yourself if they represent cognitive distortions.
- Challenging negative thoughts by looking at evidence that contradicts them.
- Replacing irrational “what if” thoughts with more reasonable outcomes based on facts.
- Doing behavioral experiments to test anxious predictions and challenge fortune telling.
- Putting worrying thoughts in perspective by asking how important they will be in a week or a year.
- Focusing on the facts of the present moment rather than imagined futures.
With practice, CBT provides concrete skills to counter anxious thoughts before they spiral out of control. Learning to recognise cognitive distortions is a powerful step in overcoming excessive worrying.
How to Stop Worrying: Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness is the practice of being present in the moment without judgement. It can be an incredibly helpful tool for managing worry and anxiety. Here are some of the key benefits of mindfulness:
- Can lower stress levels and promote relaxation. Focusing on the present helps calm the mind and body.
- Can reducer rumination and anxious thoughts. Mindfulness helps us disengage from worrying thoughts by bringing our attention back to the present.
- Can enhancee emotional regulation skills. Being present increases awareness of emotions and allows us to respond vs react.
- Can improve focus and concentration. Mindfulness trains us to pay attention to one thing at a time.
Meditation is one of the main ways to practice mindfulness. Try setting aside just 5-10 minutes each day to sit quietly and focus on your breathing. Pay attention to each inhalation and exhalation without judging yourself. When thoughts enter your mind, simply acknowledge them and then return your focus to your breath. There are many resources available online.
You can also be mindful throughout your day by bringing your full attention to daily activities. For example, while washing dishes focus on the warmth of the water and the sensation of the dishes in your hands. Or as you walk, pay attention to each step and the environment around you. Setting reminders can help you remember to be present.
Being mindful takes practice, but over time it can rewrite the brain’s patterns and end habitual worrying. Begin with small steps and gradually increase your mindfulness practice. Over time, you’ll get better at living in the moment.
How to Stop Worrying: Reduce Stress
Stress is a major contributor to excessive worrying and anxiety. When we’re stressed, it’s easy to get caught in endless cycles of anxious thoughts. Reducing stress can go a long way in learning how to stop worrying.
Make lifestyle changes to lower your overall stress levels. Getting enough sleep should be a priority, aim for 7-9 hours per night. Maintain a healthy diet with plenty of nutrients from veggies, fruits, whole grains, lean proteins and healthy fats. Stay physically active with exercise you enjoy like walking, swimming or biking.
Limit stimulants like caffeine, nicotine and sugar which can exacerbate anxious feelings. Make time for relaxing activities before bed like reading, gentle yoga or taking a bath. Reduce alcohol intake which disrupts sleep quality. Spend time outdoors and get some fresh air each day.
Listen to relaxing music and do deep breathing exercises. Try mindfulness practices like meditation, visualisation or progressive muscle relaxation to calm the mind and body. Consider massage, acupuncture or other holistic therapies. Spend time with pets and loved ones who reduce your stress levels.
Delegating tasks, getting organised and saying no to nonessentials can prevent getting overloaded. Take meaningful breaks throughout the day to reset. Keep your weekends and time off sacrosanct to recharge. Consider if any relationships or situations are causing unhealthy levels of stress, and make appropriate changes.
How to Stop Worrying: Set Aside Worry Time
Setting aside a specific “worry period” each day can be an effective way to control worrying for many people. This strategy involves postponing worrying to a designated block of time.
For example, you might set aside 30 minutes each evening to write down your worries in a journal. During your worry period, allow yourself to dwell on your anxieties without trying to problem solve or resolve the worrying thoughts. This contains the worrying to a specific window of time.
When worries come up during the day outside of your scheduled worry period, make a brief note of them and consciously set them aside by saying to yourself “I will come back to this during my worry period.” Refocus your attention fully on the present moment.
Tips for implementing a worry period:
- Pick a set time and place each day for your worry period routine. Keep it consistent.
- Start with 15-30 minutes for the worry period. You can adjust the duration over time.
- Write down your worries during the worry period. Getting them out on paper can help relieve some mental pressure.
- Remind yourself these are just worries, not facts, and you will re-examine them later.
- Avoid problem solving during the worry period. Just write down the worry for later.
- Try to stay focused on the present outside of the worry period.
- If a worry arises, make a note and refocus. Deal with the worry later.
- Over time, you may worry less overall during and outside your designated worry time.
Setting a specific daily worry period trains your mind to postpone worrying and reduces anxiety. With practice, you can gain more control over anxious thoughts.
How to Stop Worrying: See Worrying as a Habit
Many people who struggle with chronic worrying do not realise that it can become an entrenched habit over time. When we worry frequently, neuropathways in our brain become wired to trigger anxious thoughts automatically. It happens without conscious thought or intention.
This means that even if the original cause of anxiety goes away, the habit of worrying can persist. The mind has become used to reacting with apprehension and dread. Breaking this habit requires retraining your brain to short-circuit the urges to worry.
Some effective strategies include:
- Note when you start obsessing and consciously shift your focus to something else. Over time, this can weaken the neuroconnections that lead to worrying.
- When you catch yourself worrying, say “stop” out loud or in your head. Then force yourself to think about something neutral or positive.
- Keep busy with activities or hobbies, which leaves less mental space for worrying thoughts to creep in. Idle time often triggers habitual worrying.
- Monitor your self-talk and challenge anxious thoughts. Ask yourself if the worry is productive or catastrophic thinking.
- Reward yourself when you successfully avoid or cut short excessive worrying. This positive reinforcement can help rewire your brain.
- Practice relaxing activities like yoga, deep breathing, or meditation. Lowering overall stress levels can reduce compulsive worrying.
With diligence and commitment, it’s possible to break the worrying habit and regain more peace of mind. Be patient and keep trying different techniques until you find what works for you. Overcoming this challenge just takes time and consistency.
How to Stop Worrying: Seek Support
Seeking support from others can help provide perspective and reduce anxious thoughts and feelings. Connecting with friends, family, mentors, counselors, therapists, support groups, and others can provide needed comfort, insight, and reassurance.
Benefits of social and professional support
- Talking through worries with others helps get them out of your head. Verbalising anxious thoughts can make them feel less intense.
- Friends and family who care about you can provide reality testing. They can help you challenge distorted thoughts and see situations more rationally.
- Confiding in trusted friends helps you feel understood and less alone. Their support reminds you that you don’t have to handle things by yourself.
- A counsellor, therapist, or support group facilitates discussion of fears and provides coping strategies. Their outside perspective is valuable.
- Support reminds you of your inner strengths and abilities. The care and reassurance from others boosts self-confidence.
- Listening to how others have dealt with similar issues provides tried and true coping methods. You realise you have the tools to manage anxiety.
Resources for help
- Friends and family members who are good listeners and offer non-judgmental support
- Support groups, either peer-run or professionally facilitated
- Individual or group therapy
- Counselling services through your GP, community organisations, workplaces, or schools
- Crisis and mental health hotlines
- Online support communities and forums
- Self-help books and online resources
The right kind of social and professional support provides care, reassurance, and advice that can help in managing anxiety. Don’t underestimate the power of feeling understood by others.
When to Seek Professional Help
Worry and anxiety can take a toll on your mental health. While you can manage mild anxiety on your own, severe anxiety often requires professional treatment. Here are some signs it may be time to seek help and what to expect from therapy.
Signs to Seek Therapy
- Your worrying is constant and unrelenting
- Anxiety interferes with your daily activities
- You experience panic attacks
- You avoid places or events due to anxiety
- Worrying significantly impacts your sleep, appetite, or relationships
- You feel depressed in addition to anxious
- You rely on alcohol or drugs to cope with anxiety
If you experience any of the above effects from chronic worrying, it’s a sign you may benefit from professional treatment. Don’t hesitate to seek help if anxiety is disrupting your life.
Types of Providers
Several types of mental health professionals can help treat anxiety:
- Psychiatrists can prescribe medications in addition to providing therapy.
- Psychologists have doctoral degrees and provide talk therapy.
- Counsellors have master’s degrees and provide counseling.
- Psychotherapists have master’s degrees and provide therapy.
When searching for a provider, look for someone who specialises in treating anxiety disorders. Ask about their experience and techniques. It may take meeting with a few therapists before finding the right fit.
What to Expect in Counselling or Therapy
The most common therapies used to treat anxiety include:
- Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): Identifies negative thought patterns and replaces worries with more realistic thoughts.
- Exposure therapy: Gradually exposes you to feared situations in a safe setting.
- Mindfulness-based therapies: Teach relaxation and mindfulness skills.
- Medications: Such as antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds. Can be used alongside therapy.
During therapy or counselling, you’ll meet regularly with a provider to discuss your anxiety and learn skills to manage worries. It takes time and commitment to see results, but therapy and medications can be very effective at relieving anxiety. Don’t get discouraged if progress feels slow at first.
Seeking help for severe anxiety takes courage, but relief is within reach. With professional guidance, you can finally break free from chronic worrying. The investment is well worth it for a happier, less anxious life.
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